Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Seal of Approval


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Well, I met Wilton Rogers, my new trainer for the first time last night. What a really nice, great, kind, inspiring guy! I feel super jazzed and super honored that he chose me. Also, we started filming last night. It was a little weird talking about my life while someone was filming it all, but the actor in me was super excited... Also, those of you who have been following me from far back probably remember that I had auditioned for The Biggest Loser. So, filming a transformation experience isn't something that I've never thought of.


By they way, to any one else reading out there, if you ever decide to audition for The Biggest Loser, save yourself the trouble of going to the live audition. It was seriously such a waste of time to talk to someone in a room full of other people who want exactly the same thing you do and have a producer of the show just ask you 2 questions and base your whole personality off of that. Then they tell you to please still submit a video. Just submit the video.


I got the seal of approval from my new doc today, Dr. Brad (who is also totally awesome by the way!) to fully participate in the lifestyle program. So now we are just counting down the days.


I know that the biggest thing that will be changing in  my life will be my eating habits. They are going to be giving me shopping lists and meals to prepare. No more eating out for every meal for me. Knowing this, the last few weeks I've been saying good-bye to meals after I've finished eating them knowing that at the very least it will be a LONG time before I get to eat them again. And it's funny, the more I think about saying good bye to these foods that have made up my diet for the last decade of my life, I'm happy to report that I really don't think I'm going to miss them that much. I know a few years ago when I was trying to eat healthy I would complain and be a baby about not getting to drink a Sprite with dinner or whatever. I think I am finally actually in a place where, I'm done. I'm ready for someone to point me in the right direction and wave good-bye to these things that have quite literally been weighing me down.


The other weird thing so far is how much my readership of this blog has jumped recently. I know part of it is that I've been posting more often, but after Wilton posted a link to my blog he said that he had about 20 people come talk to him about it. Besides myself getting healthy, the most I can ask for out of this experience is to get others inspired and motivated to do the same. What an amazing gift to give to someone else.


Thank you so much to all of you who have been following and supporting me for so long. Your friendship and love have always meant a lot to me and I look forward to sharing this journey with all of you.


All my love,
Kristin

Monday, December 26, 2011

Hitting the Stands

This is the press release that is going out this week about my upcoming journey/transformation/revolution. I hope the story will be picked up as "my team" and I hope to inspire others on their weight loss journeys!

eVOLV Fitness
7900 San Pedro Dr. NE, Suite C1, Albuquerque NM, 87109
Monday, January 2, 2012
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
ALBUQUERQUE, NM – Grandiose personal commitments and wanton goal-setting have long been a hallmark of the New Year’s holiday.  Unfortunately, most end up evaporating prematurely in the form of a cancelled gym membership or an exercise equipment-themed garage sale come springtime.
But one deserving Albuquerque woman will be getting some extra help keeping her New Year’s resolution this year, and the timing couldn’t be better.
Kristin Berg, co-founder of The Box Performance Space and the Cardboard Playhouse children’s theater company, is getting what one could call a “resolution evolution” from a group of fitness freaks looking to make their mark on the Albuquerque gym scene.
This is no diet journal and a couple of weekly weigh-ins, one-size-fits-all approach, however.  A team of trainers, nutritionists, psychologists, and other health professionals, led by certified personal trainer and eVOLV co-founder Wilton Rogers, will create and execute a complete 12-month long lifestyle overhaul for Berg, who has battled obesity since middle school and who currently weighs 280 pounds.
“In elementary school, I looked like a regular little kid,” says Berg, now 30.  “But by the time I got to high school, I was wearing baggy boys clothing and trying my best to blend into the background.”
But blending in doesn’t seem to suit her.  Berg, who has performed in front of live audiences for more than half of her life, credits the performing arts with helping her battle severe bouts of depression throughout her high school years and early adulthood. 
“Theater is a chance to separate yourself from yourself, to live the life of someone else for a few hours,” says Berg, who wrote and produced a painfully autobiographical full-length play in college entitled “The Weight of the World.”  “It helps you become whoever you want to be, if only for a short time.”
While Berg has learned to love herself and to be comfortable in her own skin, she admits that her weight issues continue to have negative effects on her health and general quality of life.
“Chronic insomnia and acid-reflux are par for the course,” says Berg.  “It’s hard to focus during the day, and I don’t have much energy to do things.”
Energy is something Berg is in desperate need of, however.  In addition to running her theater and producing children’s shows with co-founder Doug Montoya, Berg works part-time at an event planning firm to help make ends meet.
“When we have shows, 55-hour work weeks are pretty standard,” she admits.
So with limited resources, limited time, and a string of broken promises to herself, Berg had planned to spend this New Year’s reflecting on yet another year spent getting no closer to her goal.
Berg didn’t just need a change.  She needed someone to help her make a change.  And that’s where the eVOLV Fitness team came in.
To help her make this change, she will get the support not only of Rogers’ team at eVOLV Fitness, but of an entire network of health professionals.  From an intense fitness regimen including personal and group fitness training, to comprehensive nutrition counseling and lifestyle coaching, the team will work with Berg to instill habits and rituals that she can integrate into her hectic lifestyle, ensuring that her success will not be short-lived. 
And in return for a year’s worth of life-changing?  Berg will blog, Facebook, and tweet daily about all aspects of her journey, the good, the bad and the ugly, in the hope that she can inspire others like her to make changes in their own lives. Berg admits, “embarking in this journey is really for my kids at the theater, I want them to know they can do anything they set their minds to.”
“There will be days she does not like me,” laughs Rogers.  “But she knows that everything we’ll do will come from the heart, because we care.”
Berg will embark on her journey with eVOLV Fitness beginning January 2nd.  You can follow her transformation at any of the following:
Blog:  HYPERLINK "http://www.kristinkberg.blogspot.com" kristinkberg.blogspot.com
Twitter: @kkberg
Website:  HYPERLINK "http://www.evolvfitnessnm.com" www.evolvfitnessnm.com
ABOUT eVOLV FITNESS:
eVOLV Fitness is a community where all can feel inspired to better themselves and others mentally, physically, and emotionally.  eVOLV offers a variety of group fitness classes including Body Pump, Body Combat, Cardioboxing, PAINE, Pure Muscles and much more as well as both traditional and hot yoga, pilates, and personal training.
Media Contact:
Jennifer McMath
Kesselman-Jones, Inc.
(505) 234-1570
jenny@kessjones.com

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Most Liberating Thing

Things are happening, wheels are turning and there is so much to talk about, but I need to make some stuff solid before I go off talking about it all. So in the meantime let's share a photo and a quote from my most favorite actress/who I'd want to play me in a movie Drew Barrymore. She and I are the same height, so I've got that going for me! :)

All the love,
Kristin

Thursday, December 8, 2011

The Most Amazing Gift

So, here I was thinking that today I would be posting a rather depressing blog about how it has been a year since I made these commitments to the universe and didn't uphold my end of the bargain... and while this still may be true I got an amazing gift today from a friend.

My awesome friend Jenny is a personal trainer. She and I are co-workers at my day job and we've always talked casually about me wanting to hire her to be my trainer. Monday night I finally emailed her with what I really wanted to learn and what help I needed from her to be healthy.

Today when I rolled into work she told me she had very exciting news but that I'd have to wait until 5pm. Of course I'm thinking, "Cool, she got me a diet journal or something." But when in reality she was going to make me an offer I couldn't refuse. The chance to change my life.

Jenny is very aware of my crazy lifestyle. When I'm not at our day job, I'm at the theatre, and when I'm at neither of those places I'm usually home asleep. She knew that I need much more help than she as a friend can give me, but she knew of some people who can hold me accountable and move me forward. She passed on my story to some other trainer friends of hers and lo and behold they are willing to work with me for a whole year.

Now, I don't know all of the particulars yet, but I know that I will be meeting soon with the trainers from Evolv Fitness of NM to create a plan to improve my lifestyle.

I felt so incredibly moved and grateful that this woman has faith and cares about me so much to make a strong decision for me. Moved that these people who I don't even know are willing to push me. Moved that so many of you reading this blog have stuck with me through all of my pitfalls and triumphs. So thank you to all of you.

I know I have a huge, overwhelming and difficult road ahead of me. One of the most difficult things I've ever had to do, yet I've never felt so hopeful in my life.

Here's to the Eighth of Onward 2012!

All my love,
Kristin

Friday, August 5, 2011

Creative Outlets


I obviously have not been keeping up with my goals as much as I've wanted to. Camps and rehearsals, and life and other things have continually been getting in the way. Eh, such is life.

I was thinking on the idea of how creative outlets power your life. Something I thought up the other day. We recently had our fundraiser cabaret for my theatre company. Typically, because everybody wants to perform, I'm stuck up in the tech booth with people bringing me snacks and drinks while I hit the play button on cd players, ipods and computers. Every one would always ask me afterwards, "How come you didn't perform?" This year, my business partner Doug decided that I was going to do an act, no matter what.

I had been thinking off and on for a long time about what I could do as an act. My strongest talent is acting, but doing a monologue for a room full of people isn't the most entertaining. "Oh, I'll read a poem!" I thought... then I talk to a student who says she's going to perform a poem for the cabaret... by Shel Silverstein... which is what I wanted to do... sigh. Okay, I can sing a song with the kid co-host. She was cool, ready to do it, but then I looked at our registrations. She was doing most of the performances with friends. I know it's called The Doug and Lillie Show, but I didn't want it to be just the Lillie show, so I let her know that maybe we could do a song next time. What to do now? Um... I guess I could sing a song... by myself...

WHAT? Those of you who have been in a rehearsal with me know that I have trouble carrying a tune, beside the fact that I haven't sung since I was in the non-revival version of You're a Good Man Charlie Brown in high school. That was singing with others and not by myself. Oh man... So one of the most awesomes of awesomes, Ms. Madi was working with the kiddos in my camp on their music for the show we were working on. I told her my dilemma. She said, "Let's figure out your range!" Figured that out and then she says, oh you could sing "Not for the Life of Me" from Thoroughly Modern Millie. Now, Ms. Madi played Millie in our production last year so I was super surprised when she said that because I never thought in a million years I could sing a song that she could sing. Then she also said I could sing this song called, "I Want to Go to Hollywood." (See video below) Since the cabaret's theme was Hollywood Nights, that would be a perfect choice, so my decision was made.

I was having a tough week, double and triple thinking all of my choices. Feeling like the kids in my camp weren't learning everything from me. Lots a doubt. Not the right week to try to learn a new talent. I asked Doug for help. He made me swallow my own medicine. The things that I preach to the kids all the time, I was now going to have to preach to myself. Make the song my own, make big choices, and act my way into being a singer. I so wanted to sing it like Sutton Foster on the mp3 I downloaded... but I am not Sutton Foster, and was certainly not going to become her in a week. So, I did what I've felt I do best, created a character. What if she was shy, and nerdy, and a little scared. I practiced again and again. Asked for pointers. Got reminded that if your voice is going to crack let it crack big. A week of tearing myself down and then building myself back up again. It was an emotional rollercoaster.

The day of the cabaret comes. In sound check people say what they heard was good. Cool. Still a performance to go. I got dressed, did some great make-up. Felt confident and cute. And then it was time. And I sang it. I sang it with my heart and my character and I felt good about it when it was over. Yes, my voice cracked and I sang bad notes, but it was part of my performance and I owned that. I felt invigorated. I felt like I was walking my talk. AND it felt GREAT to perform again. Being a performer was a big part I had been missing from my life the last couple of years. Challenging myself to learn something new was something I hadn't done in a LONG time. And I'm so thankful I did it. And the applause and kudos from friends and family didn't hurt either. So now, more music must be learned. Can't end this journey I've started.

And that's what I mean when I say creative outlets power your life. They give you the impetus to try new things and grow, and analyze why you've been doing things or why you haven't been doing things. And they make you power hungry for even more ways to express yourself and your thoughts. I miss acting, I miss dancing, I miss writing, and now, I miss singing. I'm not necessarily great at any of them, but I can't be afraid of failing to try. I might learn something about myself in the end.

Now, this girl isn't Sutton either, but she definitely made this song her own. Enjoy I want to go to Hollywood from the musical Grand Hotel.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

About a Month

Well, here we are. Less than 30 days to 30 years old. Still struggling, still stuck, but I feel like there has been a little progress.

So much is happening right now, it's hard to keep track of it all. We opened and closed A Year with Frog and Toad Kids, started rehearsals with a new director/writer for Confessions of a Teenage Spidergirl, preparing for friends Claire and Aileen to come down to do their show How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Lost My Virginity, getting ready for the 5th Annual Duke City Improv Festival, getting back into the swing of going to the gym, buying a new car cause the other one died, working on our 501(c)3 paperwork, helping other people produce their shows, and selling a WHOLE LOTTA TICKETS. You should see my piles of laundry. They need to get washed ASAP.

It's a lot of work for something that at times doesn't feel like it's progressing, getting better, getting closer to becoming a REAL JOB that PAYS MY BILLS. I really love what I do, but I sometimes ask myself, what am I sacrificing for what I love? Are my priorities in the right place?

I know right now my priorities should be about getting healthy, working out, eating right, because what good is having a super successful performance space and youth theatre company if I'm too big to enjoy it all. But checking email, getting to my small job on time, trying to get enough sleep, and putting toilet paper in the bathrooms always seems to get in the way. It's always the little things, right? Don't sweat the small stuff, right?

I know we need to put systems in to place for the theatre. Then we could easily tell someone, this is how to prepare and sell the tickets for the show. We are painting these flats blue, the paint brushes are always over there next to the pens, pencils, tape, scissors and all the other things that always go missing in our space. We need a professional organizer and an accountant.

I've spent most of my life working for other people, and I understand that I am the boss, but sometimes it is so hard to "man up." I rely a lot on Doug to do things, and even a lot of times to tell me what to do, when I know perfectly well what needs to be done. I just need to make some big choices, take charge, and delegate.

Seeing the beautiful and amazing Libby a while back always reminds me that I promised her that we would do a play together. A beautiful play called Stop Kiss by Diana Son. It's a vanity piece for me, casting myself in a role I'd love to play but know I typically wouldn't be cast in. I re-read the script after seeing her and it excited me to move forward to get into shape so I'll feel comfortable changing clothes in front of a theatre full of people. I made her a promise that we'd do the show in a year, and if I'm not ready, I'll give the project up. So, now to hold true to the promise I made to her, to myself and to all of you dear readers. I need to reinvent my toolbox, ask for the help I'm looking for and go onward.

All my love to you guys, and Onward ho!
KB

Sunday, March 20, 2011

80 Til 30

The countdown begins. 80 days until I turn 30 years old. The BIG 3-0. I know that in the grand scheme of things, 30 is nothing. It's a little in a whole world of big. But, partly because I think I'm supposed to, I'm freaking out.

Thirty is the age when you are supposed to be accomplished. Have made some adult movement in your life. Heading towards the life you've always dreamed of. In so many ways, I'm way ahead of the curve on this one. I started my own business with the help of my best friend at the age of 26. I get to make an impact on kids just about every day.

But, there is still this huge part of me who still feels like a lost 16 year old, trying to figure out how to make my way in the world. I always wonder, does that ever go away? Will I ever feel like a strong confident grown-up? And that's when the number 30 rears its ugly head again and says, "Uh, yeah by 30 you should be feeling grown up."

Now, I know that losing the weight is not going to solve my confidence issues overnight. I know there are a lot of other things that go into me being scared to do things. But I know that losing the weight will help. I won't constantly be wondering if people are judging me for what I'm wearing, eating, moving, doing, sitting because of how big I am. Losing the weight will make other things easier too like having energy to do warm up games with the kids, tying my shoes, yoga, fastening a seatbelt, sitting and standing for long periods of time, buying clothing. And being able to tie my shoes without feeling a little winded will definitely be a HUGE confidence boost for me. These things, that are simple and easy for others, are embarrassing to me that I can't do them with grace or ease. You should have no trouble tying your shoes at 30... 50 maybe, but that's because your getting older.

It's looking at 30 that makes you realize that yes, after this, things are not going to get easier, they are going to get harder so you need to have all the basics in place so that when things do get harder, you are ready for them. Your responsibilities become more the older you get, house, mortgage, children, car, insurance, retirement, planning how to still take care of those you love even after you are gone, they are all there staring the 30 year old in the face saying, "It's coming, and you're not ready. You've been spending all of your time and money on silly futile things. I hope you had fun."

And I have had fun, and I still plan on having fun. I think I'll have a lot more fun once I get my life in order and I won't be worrying so much about every little thing. Out of the things I've pledged to myself I haven't really followed through on a lot of it. I need to get a move on. I know all of it doesn't need to be done in the next 80 days, but I have to stop slacking so I won't keep writing this blog. I need to stop putting myself off.

All my love to you, those staring 30 in the face, those that see it coming and can laugh it off for a while longer, and especially to those who have made it through and have lived to tell the tale.

All my best,
KB

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Finding My Tribe

So I was supposed to definitely do an update on February 8th, but when I checked the scale it said I hadn't lost any weight so I wasn't sure if a picture and blog was in order. I don't know if I'm going to make my goal of 88 pounds by December. It seems highly unlikely at this point. I am still going to the gym though! Tech week totally screwed me up and then my whole cast including me got sick which also screwed things up. Oh, AND my purse got stolen from the gym parking lot. Dumb me left it in the car under my coat and they stole it by breaking my window out on the coldest night of the year. Bummer. I'm taking having to replace all my stuff as a sign from the universe that its time to start over and really take charge of everything. Also, to not leave my purse in the car anymore.

I watched this really interesting video from the Ted Talks by Seth Godin about The Tribes We Lead. Here it is embedded here:


In it he talks about people who find each other based on common interests. Now, I know I've got lots of tribes in my life, my Box Kids and Parents Tribe, my Family, and I think other subTribes with in that tribe. But I feel like I've lost my main tribe, the tribe that I can talk to for long hours about theatre, music, books. For me, since college, I've been somewhat lost. Most of my close friends moved on to graduate school or moved to larger cities while I stayed here in Albuquerque and started The Box. And for some reason or another I decided to close myself off to new people. I've always been a bit of a loner, but in recent years I've felt more lonely than anything. Relationships that I once held dear are no longer here, and I often wonder if those relationships that I thought were really close were real at all. Was I kidding myself into thinking that we had a special bond? I've been trying to figure out how to open myself up to others, try to find my tribe again, but telling all the old stories you have to tell in order to feel intimate with someone new... I just don't feel like I have the energy for all that. Reconnecting with old friends seems even harder because it feels like everyone else has moved on, has new close friends and I have just stayed where I am.

I think getting back to my acting roots might help. In our small theatre community in ABQ, people get offered parts in things very often and because I haven't acted in a million years I am always overlooked. I've been thinking about seeing if I can join the Tricklock Incubator at UNM. It would get me thinking about myself creatively again, thinking about making big choices and would allow me to talk about process and things which I seem to be craving. It would also be different than anything I've done before.

I've always felt, and I know I've expressed this to you other ENMUers, that when we were together in Portales there wasn't anything we couldn't do. I miss having that feeling. That feeling of everyone else knowing what you were talking about. Having the same skill set of tools as the person next to you. Of knowing that the people you were working with were just as talented if not more so than yourself. There was some magic that happened with us and I just feel I need to find it again.

This blog has been a long time coming and I feel I may have left some things out as I've been writing this over a few weeks.I hope it makes sense and isn't totally jumbled.

All my best,
KB